The Evil Bean…

This is my second official, no wait, make that my THIRD official day without coffee.  I made it past the headaches (sort of), without downing more than a few Aleve, but now the “craving” is starting to take over.  That craving has me driving south, towards Starbucks on autopilot.  This craving has me “tasting” coffee when I look at a coffee mug.  I don’t know why I actually cut coffee out of my diet anyways – but I think that I was tired of the shakes and the jitters. 

You see, I am one of those types of people that is never seen standing or sitting still for very long.  I have alot of positive energy and alot of nervous energy.  Let’s call the nervous energy, a by-product of my demented metabolism.  Ergo – “I don’t need additional shakes and jitters for heaven’s sake!”  Let’s use a metaphor, shall we?  It’s like giving a Chihuahua a dose of crack cocaine and watching him flip out – all day long – on slippery hardwood floors nonetheless (not a pretty sight to behold!).  Hence, this Chihuahua has stopped “snorting” the Jo, the Java, the evil Bean.

Speaking of Evil Bean – Mr. Bean has a new movie coming out later this summer – “Disaster Has a Passport” (hmm…sounds like me when I’m racing to catch a plane in LAX!).  I think that the movie may have already been released in the UK (March 2007 – Lucky Brits!  [sigh]).  Anyways, where was I?  Oh, yes.  The “distracted Chihuahua” thing….”So what is life like without coffee?” you may ask (if you haven’t denied yourself).  Well.  Let’s put it this way.  Nothing has changed!!!  I still have the same insane, tremendous energy that I had before!  What does this mean?  Am I the new Energizer spokes-bunny?  [thump, thump….].  Given that news, maybe I should hop my ass on over to Starbucks [hop, hop] and pick me up a brew…..

“I’ll have a vente, skinny, vanilla latte please – no whip…Oh, and a piece of carrot cake too – please.” [nose twitch]

phew!  zany? nuts? quirky? or just hopeless?



6 responses to “The Evil Bean…

  1. Hilarious! I’d go back if I were you – now!
    Oh, how terribly unsupportive, I’m sorry! It’s one of my true loves though and I made decision last year that it’s staying (despite my health job!) because it makes me happy. I too have the crazy metabolism so have to keep it to two a day. Even that is too much, but… too bad!!
    Good luck crazy girl! 😉

  2. And I am the slow turtle to your bunnyness. Coffee is a must for me. Yin/Yang?
    The chihuahua/crack cocaine/slippery hardwood floor had me cracking up. What a mental image!

  3. poseidonsmuse

    Simonne – I’m officially “off of the wagon” as of tomorrow (where I shall find the tallest bloody latte in town and drink it as I divine in it’s exquisite taste….grrrrrr….12 hours and counting).

    Observant – Yes! We are yin-yang. Turtles “rock” by the way (I have one and she is amazing…). [hop, hop].

  4. He he! Good for you! Enjoooooy that first delicious sip… (Not that I’m addicted or anything! Am working from home this morning and my espresso machine hasn’t had a chance to cool down yet!)

  5. poseidonsmuse

    Simonne – If I ever head to Australia, you will have to show me the ropes (re: Espresso machine). I have a cheap old Mr. Coffee machine and need an upgrade…Good luck with writing this morning!

  6. Sure thing! Will take you to some of my favourite cafes too and we can sit in the sun sipping lattes, talking books, and smile at how very wonderful life truly is 🙂

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